Many times folks don't realize that they are sitting crooked in the saddle. If they are off-center in the saddle, they tend unintentionally to "grip" or create a brace on the side that they are less connected with the horse. This lack of centered-ness affects the communication, timing in the use of an aid and the quality of the ride.
We often talk about "independent" aids, and riders for years have been hearing things such as "hands up, heels down, look up, sit up," etc. but do not understand how when one body part is "misaligned" there is a trickle down effect on the rest of the rider's body parts.
Something as "simple" as looking down, can cause the rider's shoulder's to curl forward, them to roll their pelvis creating lack of balanced seat, and push down with their toes to prevent them selves from "falling." It can cause the rider to lock their elbow and wrist, grip with their finders and hang on the reins.
So frequently though instructors tend to nag the rider about an individual body part, rather than educating the student how each piece is connected, and helping them learn to find "center" when in the saddle. By doing so, it can help "fix" problems that tend to plague riders for years.
I'm not going through my whole anatomical riding lecture on here, but I will offer you the initial and most important piece. ALL of the rider's balance comes from their seat bones. Those are the two pointy bones at the top of the thigh that you sit on.
If you imagined your seat bones were like the two prongs on an electrical cord, and you are going to learn to "plug" yourself into the saddle, rather than sitting on the saddle like a sack of potatoes.
You can practice sitting in your saddle without the horse. First stand straight up in the stirrup, then place yourself in what you think is the center of the saddle. Notice if you can feel both bones equally or if you're sitting heavier to one side. (Typically if you're right handed you'll always sit heavier to that side, and same thing vice versa.)
Now practice feeling two incorrect positions (which will help you find the ideal position faster.)
First, over-rotate your pelvis down and curl it forward towards where the horse's ears would be. You'll feel your entire upper body compress, or shrink, to "compensate" from your lack of stability- this will also cause your lower leg to swing out in front of you, and for you to unintentionally "push" backwards in the saddle becoming behind the horse's motion.
In the second incorrect position you'll rotate your hips forward and your pelvis back, towards the horse's tail. You'll feel your lower back hollow and you'll unintentionally pull your shoulders back and together to avoid the feeling of falling forward, but because of the awkwardness, if you had reins in your hands, you'd be gripping for "stability" without meaning to.
Then stand up and re-seat yourself and find those seat bones and imagine plugging them straight down into the center of the saddle again, like you were plugging the electrical cord into the outlet.
You can practice "finding them" on any hard surface you sit on, but this is something that needs to become a "natural," instantaneous behavior in your own body. At first you'll have to conscientiously remind yourself to keep assessing your body and focusing on finding them and center.
Without the centered and plugged in seat, the rider's legs grip, cling, and "drive," creating unintentional nagging that the horse learns to ignore. Their hands and arms create a brace for the horse to lean on, become heavy on the bridle and there is a "wall" that limits the communication between human and the horse's brain.
With all of this lack of clarity, horse and riders tend to feel lost and overwhelmed, causing them both to become defensive.
If you're curious about learning more, check out the Balanced Rider Series on the Remote Horse Coach video catalog.
