7 Questions to Improve Time with your Horse

Horse and Human Help

Improve Time with your Horse

Samantha Harvey- Alternative Horsemanship ™ the Remote Horse Coach™


I believe people can learn from many different forms of shared horse knowledge (even if it is what not to do,) BUT I find without a clear foundational basis, the constant barrage of "dos and don'ts" that drastically differ in shared horse training approaches, theories, and methods can be exhausting for the student to filter through.

Horse Learning Help - When we Stop Powering Through

Horse Help from Irrelevant Influences
Horse Learning Help

When "Powering Through" Quits Working


I had remote coaching students on multiple continents this week- and the general theme was discussing breath... The students' backgrounds were drastically different, as were their ages, and horse experience.

Yet, along their individual paths of raising self- awareness to improve the relationship with their horse, each had come to the conclusion of how much "work" it was to intentionally breathe.

It sounds funny as the most basic instinctive need to survive is to breathe- and somehow, here we are as human beings, rapidly "losing" the connection between breath and our mind, emotions, and body.

Of course, this isn't just a "horse people problem," but it is magnified for those who spend time with, around, or riding the incredibly sensitive animals.

The cliche of "your horse reflects you," is an understatement.

Breath affects the human's mental, emotional, and physical state. It directly influences the quality, specificity, timing, and effectiveness of communication with the horse.

It is not something that can be brushed aside as a, "I'll work on that someday..." if the goal is to evolve the quality of one's relationship with the horse.

I've had various students describe trying to re-learn how to "breathe naturally" as:

  • *Feeling like their chest was being compressed by boulder
  • *The deeper the intentional breath, the more they found themselves gasping for air
  • *The more they focused on their breath, they realized the tension in their muscles increased
  • *They couldn't "focus" on their breath while doing any other activity
  • *They could achieve softer breathing, but then as soon as something distracted them, they'd "lose" the rhythm

I'll be honest, it is very uncomfortable to reach a moment of recognizing how disconnected we have become from our bodies. Once you realize patterns in yourself, even if you don't have the energy to address them now, the awareness is a "burden."

For a lot of years (decades actually,) much of western society's "norms" have wreaked havoc on the human nervous system; unrealistic demands, distractions, expectations, time urgencies, etc. have contributed to deregulated states as the human loses any natural sense of physical awareness they are born with.

From mobility, to breathing, to intention- for many people, what came naturally as a child, dissipates the more "societal influenced" people become as they unintentionally drift away from what was once instinctive responses.

When I first started teaching, I had intentionally titled one of my web pages: "Back to Basics"- people HATED the name. HATED the reference, and I eventually gave in and changed it.

The problem with the name, based on the feedback- was people who'd spent years with horses, didn't want to have insinuated that they needed to "go back" (society's "what have you achieved by now") or that they were still needing to learn "the basics," (society's hurry up, do more, multitask, result drive outcomes need to "prove" the time/money/effort was worth it.)

I specifically created the title because so many people were coming to me with "problem horses," but themselves were missing fundamental basics in understanding, awareness, and skills-and instead were wanting to "fix" things (symptoms,) rather than recognizing or acknowledging that to help the horse, it started with their self-awareness and availability to learn. Including, inconsistent breathing.

Society rewards the mindset of "powering through" or "making something happen," which doesn't work with horses... I mean, it may temporarily appear to get desired results with a certain type/personality of horse, but then one day, "all of a sudden..." it doesn't.

So much presented societally, socially, media wise, etc. is about using literal or figurative strength to force things to occur or comply. This also doesn't work with horses... which is why you are reading posts shared on this site.

So, coming back to the idea of breath... Think of someone who lifts weights at the gym, unintentionally more often than not, they end up holding their breath as they try to engage their muscles. The personal trainers will remind them to breathe, instead, you'll see braced, tight, rigid behavior as they anticipate engaging in the activity.

It is no difference to what I see people do ALL the time with their horses. Even if not literally thinking they are "powering" through something... whether hopeful, passive, avoidant, or trying to be "believable"- they often hold their breath.

When emotions are engaged, they hold their breath... the same goes for when someone is lacking confidence, distracted, or carrying stresses from other aspects of life.

So remember... it starts with awareness.

Don't impose self-critique or judgement once you realize what your current "norm" is.

Do see every opportunity to "reset" as retraining your brain and body- which helps in all aspects of daily life, not just your horse time.

Don't expect sudden changes in yourself if you've been doing something unintentionally for decades.

Do only attempt a minute or two at a time (I'm not kidding) of intentionally breathing... initially, you'll be mentally exhausted.

Imagine all the potential positives that could occur if you treat yourself with the same kindness as you'd offer others ...

The Pitfalls of Horse Learning

Horse Help from Irrelevant Influences
Horse Learning Problems

Removing the Rose Colored Glasses



My students who are most “successful” in their horse learning are not always the ones to reach “the end results” fastest. Instead, they are the individuals who are more interested and curious in learning how to develop the skills to communicate and work with the horse, rather than resorting to seeking quick fixes, or creating stories to explain away resistance or unwanted equine behaviors.

Replacing Fear Cycles in our Horsemanship

Horse Help from Irrelevant Influences
Replacing Fear

Horse Learning to build Skills and Confidence


 The fear of "getting it wrong" can overwhelm people into doing nothing. Avoidance is a common "tactic" in both insecure people and horses. 

Horse Behavior: 5 Physical Assessment Opportunities

When learning or experimenting with a new way of communicating and interacting with the horse, people can unintentionally develop intensity in their facial expression, the tension in their posture, increased energy, and tight movement.



Horse Learning Help & Tips



Horse Learning




Irrelevant of where in the world one is, there is always learning opportunities... Even if "just" from the horse's communication and behavior.

Horse Help- Understand and Communicate Clearly

 


In Conversations with the horse, we are asking them to mentally "search" for what is being presented, and then to physically act upon those thoughts.

The Effective of your Horse Communication

 I find that sometimes making comparisons outside of the “horse world” helps folks better see/believe when they are with their equine.


Horse Skills- The missing "tool" of the Positive Alternative


 In many training approaches, the moment a horse does something unwanted, the response is correction. The focus is only on stopping, blocking, and criticizing the equine behavior, to “teach him a lesson.” This leads to what I call “surviving” the experience/ride.

Improving your Horse Sense- The Three A's



Improving your Horse Sense- The Three A's





Assess(ment)- Of the horse to evaluate the mental availability, emotional state, and physical softness. Assessing is a foundational key to build a partnership with your horse because it gives the human a "starting point" of what needs to be addressed to help the horse.

Chasing the Horse Dream

 Chasing the Horse Dream


I meet horse people wherever I go in the world, whether or not I’m traveling for work or by random happenstance. More often than not, I hear stories of how they chose to leave the mainstream rhetoric/perceptions of working/thinking/interacting with horses to explore and develop their individual quality long-term equine relationship.

Improving Horse Rider Balance- Raising Awareness

 It all starts with Awareness


I just finished doing a 12 hour drive drive. I encountered horrendous fog, hail, pelting rain, light snow, sun, strong wind gusts, and just about any other weather you can think of.
Throughout the drive, I would audibly exhale, reset my fingers on the steering wheel, notice the tension in leg muscles from the incessant shift through the high mountain, twisty road climbs, and "open" my toes in my shoes, I'd observe if I was "hard" staring at the road or if I could zoom in and out at various degrees on the details of the surroundings. I "checked in" with my shoulders- if they were scrunched up and together toward my neck, or if I could rotate the muscle onto the scapula and "open" my chest to have a soft breathing. I noticed if my tongue was "stuck" on the roof of my mouth or rested without tension...

Hurried horse behavior problems

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A lot of humans anticipate "what will happen" when with their horse.

There is a fine line between being aware of your surroundings and things that are occurring at the moment, but also not fixating on potential unwanted outcomes.
I suggest that folks notice their own thought patterns. Whether it is occurring before they are with their horse or in a moment with the equine, to learn to notice when their mind gets "stuck on a thought."

Horse Skills and Improving the Equine Partnership

 Nothing is too “basic.”



To demonstrate how repetitive interactions or behaviors can lead to mindlessness, I’ll sometimes ask students if they’ve ever been showering and suddenly stopped, and thought to themselves, “Did I already wash my hair?” People will chuckle at the “guilt” of realizing they might have had a similar experience...