Showing posts with label horse help. Show all posts
Showing posts with label horse help. Show all posts

Why the Horse Training Hasn't Worked

You've Tried the Trainers. Here's Why It Hasn't Worked. | Alternative Horsemanship™
Perspective & Approach

You've Tried the Trainers.
Here's Why It Hasn't Worked.

Your skepticism about horse professionals is probably well-earned. Let's talk honestly about what's actually going on — and what it would take to change it.

I'm going to start with something most people in my profession won't say: if you've worked with multiple trainers and clinicians and still feel like something fundamental is missing — if your horse is "better" for a few weeks and then isn't — your instinct that something isn't right is probably correct.

That's not a comfortable thing to say, because I am a trainer and clinician. But after 30 years of working with horses and humans on six continents, I've seen the pattern repeat too many times to pretend otherwise.

The frustrating part isn't that people are trying. Most horse owners I've worked with are trying very hard. The frustrating part is that most of what gets offered in this industry is focused on the horse — on changing his behavior, managing his responses, producing a more compliant animal — without honestly addressing the variable that is actually most in play: the human.

The Symptom Gets Fixed. The Cause Doesn't.

When a horse has an unwanted behavior — refusing, tension, defensiveness, reactivity — the standard professional response is to address that specific behavior. The pulling, the spooking, the bucking, whatever it is. And often it gets better, at least for a while. The trainer addresses it, demonstrates something that works in their hands, the horse responds — and the owner leaves feeling like progress was made.

But here's what doesn't get addressed: why that behavior was happening in the first place, and what role the human's communication, timing, awareness, or emotional state played in creating the conditions for it. A horse that is tense and reactive is telling you something. Most training "fixes" the telling, not the thing being told.

"Unwanted horse behaviors are symptoms, not causes. Learning to interpret the subtle, underlying equine communication allows you to recognize and address root issues rather than mask them."

I use the word "surviving" to describe what many horse-human interactions actually look like, even when they appear functional. The rider gets through the session, the horse doesn't do the really bad thing, nobody got hurt. But neither party was actually communicating with the other. The human was managing, and the horse was tolerating. That's not a partnership — it's an ongoing negotiation between two unclear parties, and it's exhausting for both.

The Human Filter Nobody Talks About

Here's the thing about horses — they are the most honest communicators most humans will ever encounter in their lives. They have no agenda. They are not being stubborn, ornery, or difficult on purpose. They respond to what is actually being offered to them, which is why the same horse can be completely different depending on who is handling him.

What they respond to is clarity, consistency, and someone who is actually present. What most humans bring to the interaction — without realizing it — is anticipation, emotional filtering, unconscious habits, and unresolved tension from the last thing that went wrong. The horse feels all of it. He doesn't know what to do with it. He responds in ways that then get labeled as "bad behavior."

I warn students when they begin learning this: once you can see it, you cannot unsee it. That's both the gift and the difficulty of this work. Because once you genuinely start to understand what the horse is communicating, you realize how much of what you thought was happening in your interactions was actually just your own story layered over the top of the horse's real response.

What Most Professionals Are Incentivized Not to Tell You

I don't say this to be harsh to my colleagues, but the economics of the training industry create a particular kind of pressure. Clinicians who fill arenas rely on dramatic visible transformation in a short window of time. The before-and-after, the moment of connection, the horse that was "bad" and is now "good." Those moments are real. But they happen in the trainer's hands, with the trainer's timing, read, and awareness — and then the owner goes home without the foundational understanding that made those moments possible.

The result is a cycle that I see constantly: take a lesson or attend a clinic, feel inspired and hopeful, go home, things gradually slide back, take another lesson or find another clinician, feel hopeful again. The horse gets older and more confirmed in his patterns. The rider gets subtly more discouraged, even if they can't quite name it.

The students who make the most lasting progress in their horsemanship are not always the ones who improve fastest. They are the ones who become genuinely curious about the process of learning, rather than focused on arriving at specific outcomes quickly.

They stop asking "how do I get my horse to stop doing X?" and start asking "what is my horse actually trying to communicate when he does X, and what is my role in creating that situation?"

That shift in question changes everything.

What "Alternative" Actually Means

I named my approach Alternative Horsemanship™ for a reason. Not because it is trendy, and not as a marketing word. Alternative, in this context, means an alternative to the default — to the widespread industry approach that prioritizes compliance, repetition, and performance over genuine understanding of equine behavior and honest assessment of the human's role.

What that looks like practically:

  • We don't label horse behavior as good or bad — we read it as information
  • We address the human's timing, presence, emotional state, and clarity — not just what the horse is doing
  • We look for root causes instead of managing symptoms
  • We don't progress to a new skill until the foundation underneath it is actually solid
  • We accept that real change in a horse-human relationship is not fast — and that's not a failure, it's honest
  • We understand that the goal is a genuine partnership built on trust, not a more obedient animal

For the Person Who is Done with Quick Fixes

If what I've written here resonates, it's probably because you've already been through enough cycles of hope and disappointment to be skeptical of the next thing that promises results. I understand that completely, and I'm not asking you to take this on faith.

What I do offer is access to how I think — through articles, videos, and an introductory consultation where I can hear specifically what's going on with you and your horse. Not to tell you what's wrong or offer a formula, but to have an honest conversation about what is actually happening and whether this approach is something you want to explore further.

If you're the person who has been quietly thinking there has to be something more real than what you've been offered so far, that's probably a useful instinct to follow.

If this way of thinking speaks to you

The Intro Consult is a conversation, not a sales call. It's a chance to discuss where you are with your horse, ask questions, and see if this is the right fit for where you want to go.

7 Questions to Improve Time with your Horse


I believe people can learn from many different forms of shared horse knowledge (even if it is what not to do,) BUT I find without a clear foundational basis, the constant barrage of "dos and don'ts" that drastically differ in shared horse training approaches, theories, and methods can be exhausting for the student to filter through.

Horse Learning Help - When we Stop Powering Through



When we Stop Powering Through





I had remote coaching students on multiple continents this week- and the general theme was discussing breath... The students' backgrounds were drastically different, as were their ages, and horse experience.

Horse Learning Help & Tips



Horse Learning




Irrelevant of where in the world one is, there is always learning opportunities... Even if "just" from the horse's communication and behavior.

The Effective of your Horse Communication

 I find that sometimes making comparisons outside of the “horse world” helps folks better see/believe when they are with their equine.


Horse Skills- The missing "tool" of the Positive Alternative


 In many training approaches, the moment a horse does something unwanted, the response is correction. The focus is only on stopping, blocking, and criticizing the equine behavior, to “teach him a lesson.” This leads to what I call “surviving” the experience/ride.

Horse Skills and Improving the Equine Partnership

 Nothing is too “basic.”



To demonstrate how repetitive interactions or behaviors can lead to mindlessness, I’ll sometimes ask students if they’ve ever been showering and suddenly stopped, and thought to themselves, “Did I already wash my hair?” People will chuckle at the “guilt” of realizing they might have had a similar experience...

Horse Learning without Guarantees

 The only consistent thing I have found to be true is humans ARE seeking connection.


Repeatedly, social media videos that “do best” show the horse that is willing to interact with people, offering an emotional connection. The promise gives viewers hope, triggering interaction… A great motivator for change, or to “activate” people- whether to react, sign up, or buy into a belief system- is to engage the human emotion of hope.

The New Year: Horse Learning without Guilt- New Beginnings


I'm very aware that this time of year can stir up a particular kind of mental static. It’s the inner critic, tallying up the "not yets" and the "I should haves" with your horse.

Let's name it: Horse Guilt. It’s that feeling that you didn't do enough, "fix" enough, ride enough, or progress enough.

Guilt is not a motivator; it is a paralyzer.

H.E.L.P. Reset, Refocus, and Ride Strong into the New Year

Why Short, Flexible Coaching Might Be Exactly What You Need Right Now

The holidays are a beautiful mix of celebration, reflection, and—let’s be honest—stress. Between busy schedules, winter weather, family expectations, and year-end pressure, it’s no surprise that many riders and horse owners feel overwhelmed or stuck this time of year.

But the end of the year also creates new opportunities:
A chance to reset your mindset, refine your goals, and start the new year with clarity and confidence—without locking yourself into long-term coaching commitments.

That’s exactly why I created H-E-L-P, a short-format, easy-access coaching service available through remote horse coaching.

What Is H-E-L-P?

H-E-L-P is a targeted coaching option designed for equine enthusiasts and horse owners who:

  • Need help fast

  • Don’t want lengthy coaching programs

  • Prefer flexible, short-term support

  • Want expert guidance without pressure, contracts, or subscriptions

It’s the coaching version of “I just need someone to walk me through this right now.”

Whether you’re facing a behavioral issue, confidence dip, training block, or simply want clarity on your next steps, H-E-L-P gives you direct support—quickly and without obligation.

No long commitment.
No monthly billing.
No complicated program structure.
Just clear, supportive, actionable guidance when you need it most.

 The end of the year tends to amplify challenges:

  • Less riding time

  • Weather interruptions

  • Schedule chaos

  • Horse behavior changes

  • Rising stress + lowered confidence

  • Pressure to “start the new year right”

This is often when riders feel most alone in their struggles.

But you don’t need to push through it solo.

H-E-L-P lets you tap into quick, expert support exactly when something pops up, without having to commit to a long-term coaching relationship. It’s a tool you can use once, occasionally, or as needed while navigating the season.

What You Get With H-E-L-P

Every H-E-L-P session is built to be:

✔ Short & efficient

Focused sessions that deliver clarity without requiring hours of your time.

✔ Flexible

Use it when you need it. Skip it when you don’t.

✔ No long-term commitment

Perfect for riders who just need targeted guidance or a quick problem-solving session.

✔ Completely remote

No hauling horses, rearranging schedules, or dealing with winter footing.

✔ Personalized to your situation

Your horse, your goals, your challenge—no cookie-cutter advice.

Alternative Horsemanship™ Remote Horse Coach H.E.L.P. Coaching Program

Holiday Special: Give Yourself (or a Friend) the Gift of Support

This season is all about care—so why not extend some of that care to yourself and your partnership with your horse?

H-E-L-P is a perfect holiday boost:

  • For seasonal horse time interruptions

  • For owners dealing with sudden changes in equine behavior or training issues

  • For anyone entering the new year wanting clarity and direction

  • For gift-givers looking for something meaningful and practical

Sometimes the most valuable gift is simply help—the right help, at the right moment.

Ready to Start?

If you’re craving clarity, encouragement, or a step forward—without commitments or pressure—H-E-L-P is ready when you are.

👉 Visit RemoteHorseCoach.com/H-E-L-P to reserve your session.

Step into the new year with confidence, support, and a clear plan for you and your horse. You deserve that—and your horse will thank you for it, too.


Horse Help: Understanding before Expectations with Alternative Horsemanship™

 

“Understanding Before Expectations”




Have you ever driven a vehicle that suddenly started drifting, pulling, or moving in a way you didn’t want?

If that happened, would you stop the car, get out, and try to physically force the wheels into the direction you wanted them to go?

Of course not.
You’d start by troubleshooting:

  • What is the condition of the tires?

  • Is there an issue with the axles or brakes?

  • Are the fluids low?

  • Is the steering column misaligned?

Even if you didn’t understand the mechanics yourself, you would look for or seek guidance to find the root cause of the problem.

Why don’t we do the same with our horses?

In traditional training, when a horse shows unwanted behavior, the common response is:

  • Add more equipment

  • Use harsher aids

  • Try to force compliance

  • Speed up the training

  • Push/drive/chase the horse through his resistance

But all that does is magnify the holes
in the horse’s education
and in reflect a lack of human understanding.

When we mask symptoms instead of addressing root causes, unwanted behaviors don’t disappear…
they simply morph into something else.
Balking becomes bolting.
Tension becomes spooking.
Resistance becomes shutdown.
And owners are left wondering what the horse will do next.


Alternative Horsemanship™ is not about controlling the horse.
It’s about understanding the horse
their communication, mental state, and natural responses.

Instead of reacting to problems,
we learn to see the early subtle signs of worry, anticipation, or defensiveness.
We teach the skills to learn how to recognize and address the root cause before it becomes a unreasonable or potentially dangerous behavior.

This approach focuses on building a foundation through:
✔ Clear communication
✔ Observing the horse’s communication
✔ Understanding how to influence the horse's mind to create changes in equine behavior or natural instincts
✔ Awareness of your own mindset, emotions, and habits
✔ Interactions that create a safe space for learning to build trust—rather than demanding fearful compliance or forced submission

Whether you realize it or not,
you are always teaching your horse.
Your energy, timing, clarity, and intention is reflected in the horse's responses.


If you’re tired of:

  • Fixing the same problems over and over

  • Hoping for “good days”

  • Wondering what your horse will do next

  • Feeling like training is a guessing game

Then it’s time to build a foundation based on understanding rather than reacting.

Because the quality of your horsemanship isn’t measured by:
❌ fancy equipment
❌ how quickly you get results
❌ what someone else can make your horse do

It’s reflected in:
✔ Intention
✔ Commitment
✔ Adaptability
✔ Clarity
✔ And your willingness to help the horse in front of you

Alternative Horsemanship™ branched into becoming The Remote Horse Coach to help you virtually learn how to create a relationship that’s not dictated by fear, dominance, or performance pressure—
but by communication, confidence, and calmness.


If you're ready to replace hope with understanding,
reactiveness with clarity,
and frustration with confidence—
learn how Alternative Horsemanship™ the Remote Horse Coach can help you on horse journey.

Let’s begin building a partnership founded on awareness, curiosity, and mutual respect.

Visit the Individual Virtual Horse Coaching or the Horse Learning Video Catalog

Learning Horse Skills- Raising Self-Awareness

 

Your thoughts influence your Behavior, Communication, and Interactions with the horse.
How one describes the horse's behavior reflects a lot more about the person, than what is actually happening with the equine.

Check out these Horse Learning Mindset Webinars on the Remote Horse Coach video catalog.